Completion Process over Marriage and "Change of Spouse":
I thought on types of marriage and applied the term "
spouse change" on different types of marriage and found it applies to
certain types of marriages and does not applies to others. In a deep implementation
of Vedic Completion process over Phenomenon of Marriage, I come up with
following keywords entered into my self discussion during completion process.
·
Marriage and the Rituals of Marriage
·
Marriage and the Mating
·
Mating and the Rituals of Marriage
·
Only Mating (Human)
This raised a question : What is
Marriage? What is Marriage and the Love and What is Union ?
It Further provided me with following list:
·
Marriage : Love and the Mating, which makes a Union
·
Marriage : Rituals of Marriage and the Mating
·
Only Mating
Final List
1.
Marriage type 1: Love and Union
2.
Marriage type 2: Rituals of Marriage and certification
for Mating
3.
Marriage type 3: Only Mating
Marriage type 2: Rituals of Marriage and the Certification for Mating :
What is Rituals of Marriage and
Certification of mating ?
When ritual of marriage are
conducted and it is declared that marriage have happened. Marriages can be
termed as Rituals of Marriage. which
offers a certification for mating, to have family and raise up children.
To have a social presence as married couple. The rituals of marriage can take
place due to any reason like social protocols, for children, mating, wealth,
money, diplomatic, social status, professional growth, materialistic growth,
forcefully, accidentally, lust, or any other vested interest. The ritual of
marriage can also take place due to emotions or feelings which are
misunderstood as love, often feeling of lust are very easily misinterpreted as
lust. After marriage when reasons of such misunderstood feelings disappear,
marriage converts to mere arrangements of social protocol of a family. A
marriage can also get converted into a mere ritualistic arrangement if partners don't get along well
or stop getting along well due to any temporary or permanent reason. This type
of marriages commonly produces following breakage points.
·
Unsatisfied, Stressful individual in the
relationship of marriage
·
Left alone individual in the relationship of
marriage
·
Individuals exhausted of over responsibilities,
loosing their natural flow of life.
·
Individuals running behind materialistic success
leaving another partner and family.
·
Sincere non changeable reasons why a partner
have to move out.
In such scenarios when the
marriage have become a mere arrangement and not a volunteer companionship.. the
phenomenon "Change of Spouse" may take place. But it is not always so
because individual can also select not to join any one as a spouse again. they
can also decide to live without mating.
How does type 2 marriage
happens: Type 2 marriages are
essentially void of Love and responsibility along with love. In few cases of
type 2 marriages we can see Integrity, authenticity, responsibility. We can
also see some quantity of enrichment too, but enrichment is essentially low ,
while love is often not available. When a couple spend more time together, they
start feeling habitual to each other, this habit is considered as love for most
of the time. but being habitual of each other is not being into love, because
to make habitual another person, an strategic mental conditioning can also be
used. often we see couples practices Manipulations, Emotional blackmailing or
giving NO Space to each other. Often they tries to rule other person, and
manipulate them to make them fulfill their expectations. Man normally pick up
fights, woman normally pick up crying when their expectations are not
fulfilled, another person don't want to create a mess and fulfills the
demand.
Marriage is also : when rituals
of ,marriage are performed with authenticity.
Only
being authentic ensures fulfilling the commitment authentically with
responsibility. So we must say Integrity, Authenticity and Responsibility can
take place in this marriage in a happy scenario which is a marriage due to
rituals. Factor of enriching each other may also be found . it may be in a good
quantity or low. Often responsibilities takes priority then emotional
fulfillment in such cases. But if both have tendency of enrich each other then it
provide a very good possibility to
introduce Love and Care entering into Union of
marriage.
Type 1 Marriage : Love and Union :
LOVE makes a marriage. Love makes
Rituals of Marriage a Marriage. Such a relation which is completely void of
the phenomenon of "Change of Spouse".
A Commitment to each other due to
Love, makes a Marriage and Rituals of
Marriage a Marriage.
About Love which is involved in this commitment:
"Committing together due to
Love" is committing together due to a feeling which is self existing, Self
Sustaining for partner, even in absence of any response or efforts from their
side. Love is only that feeling which is
self sustaining in absence of any proof, doubt, effort, or response from the
person being loved. Love is self sustaining even if it is questioned or attempted
to be hurt by the partner itself, in Love a person knows that the partner
loves, and so it is free form all modifications.
Very important to note : "In a commitment together due to
love" commitment can happen before the rituals of marriage or after the
rituals of marriage. How ever rituals of
marriage are also completely optional . It is the commitment together which
matters, ritual of marriage can be optional..
what more: even mating too . :)
A commitment from that feeling to
each other makes Marriage a Union . More
expectations free, self sustaining Love is involved between the partners, More
strong is the bond of Marriage. The same becomes the Union
of consciousness, Consciousness become One and is represented by two bodies.
Many of you would argue it is not
possible to have such a love. I will only make you realize . most of us have
realized this very love with our spouse.
This very marriage is popular here in this land of India India we have those rituals , that
help generating pure and conscious feelings about each other. Let us not take
those details here, but a separate description can be prepared on these methods
and rituals. Arrange marriages have been very popular in India , Arrange marriages have been
very stable marriages too. Entire culture have evolved around stable and open
relationships. This is the beauty of our culture.
Cosmic Significance of this Union
What is the Cosmic Significance of this Marriage: Cosmic consciousness gets united and becomes
one, or we say its only one cosmic consciousness which is represented in form
of two bodies. Let us assume this
combined consciousness as one unit within entire cosmic consciousness.
When conscious fields joins
together and very smoothly get dissolved into one combined filed of conscious , it simply get consistent with the harmony of
the cosmic consciousness. It does not provide any disturbances or any
in-completion into the cosmic existence. It is absorbed As it Is with in the
cosmic conscious field and the combined consciousness of the married couple
continues to be in sync with cosmic harmony. It
provide instant opportunity to expand further and radiate consistently.
Maintaining harmony and peace in the space around , with who so ever come in
contact feel pleasant and peaceful.
We all know when we meet a loving
and caring couple, we all feel good, and we never want to meet the nasty people
who keep on fighting or messing around with each other.
Now what about Changing Spouse:
In the entire process of changing spouse, many in-completion are introduced: within the
partners: there are emotional hurting among each other, Children suffers from drastic
in-completion and disturbances, Due to in-completion in Children, they tend to
generate patterns which are further propagated in upcoming generations until
they eventually evolve to meet a Guru. Families, Relative and Friends also
receive in-completion, finally in case of divorce mostly there starts further
cycle of social stress and concerns. it is involved with lies, blames, doubts,
a complete package of huge in-completion which is enough for you to life.
This entire process generates
disturbances in cosmic existence around us, generates in-completion, these
in-completion generates patterns, and new disturbances are created in the cosmic
existence. like the natural law , any disturbance moves into a direction of its
settlement; to maintain harmony of the system as a whole. All such disturbances too
moves into direction of there settlement but if we see one split cause multiple
disturbances and multiple movements. instead of instance opportunity to expand
further we first enters into setting up circumstances around us. If we meditate
closely all these movements are initiated by us only. because we got into a
spouse change.
Does it mean that we must Not think of spouse change no matter how
genuine our step is? Should we continue being a victim.
No. neither we need to continue being a victim,
nor we need to avoid our genuine requirement. It is completely our call to take
a decision on what we want. All we can have a rough idea which type of movement
we are creating around us and how will it progress. Cosmos is only fulfilling
what we want. Cosmos never denies to generate any change around us. because it
is self sustainable , self maintainable cosmic consciousness which always moves
in direction of harmony, and it always remain in harmony. Any disturbance is subsequently addressed to
be settled down, yet at any moment cosmos always remains in harmony. So its completely our call and we are free to
take it.
How does it not impact at Cosmos, if we choose for a spouse change or
not:
Cosmos is such an existence which
is in harmony. which is self sustainable, self maintainable, and self
destructible. even after destruction it is continuous existent. it is not so
difficult to understand. we have seen many such analogy in our day to day life
, in natural phenomenon that we can easily understand : how cosmos is always in
harmony and yet consistently moves towards harmony.
But as we have given an argument
that spouse change generates disturbances / in-completion / movements in the
cosmos so it must impact at cosmos.
No it does not impact. Infinite
movements are being generated every moment and infinite movements are bring to
rest at the very moment. It is just a course of a nature of cosmos. it does not
impact at all. Cosmic consciousness
never resist any movement or any disturbance. We know cosmic bodies keep on
changing its construction at any given point of time and space. All movements
get settled, all movements make impacts and all movements give birth to new
movements. This is very nature of cosmos. so it is never impacted and it never
resist.
As you are the same cosmic
consciousness represented by a body so
you are also not impacted ideally.
Then why Stable Marriage is preferred ?
Because it does not introduce any
disturbance in our surrounding to which we all are connected. It does not bring
any incompletion and does not push us into further cycle to settle that
incompletion. we instantly experience an extended consciousness by a stable
marriage. if every family would continue providing incompletion, it would
increase the cycle of movements, anger, incompletion with in people and thus in
society. hence it is preferred to have
peaceful stable relationship to experience higher expansion of consciousness within society. If we are able
to maintain harmonious couples it would provide happy children and happy cosmic
consciousness around us. That is why we
all give stress on a stable marriage especially in India we give stress on stable and
lasting relationships. We also stress upon comfortable presence of both of the
partners with in the relationship, as we know it is not possible to maintain
harmony if even if one of them is not comfortable consistently. So entire
Indian society and Indian culture have evolved in a way where value is given to
the healthy relationships. Not only between spouse but to every member of the
family, relatives, friends and society.
Outcome
As per need of the day we must
promote stable relationships especially between the spouse. We must not promote
split even in jokes. We must also stop cracking jokes on marriage relationships.
Instead we must educate society for maintaining healthy and long lasting
relationships. We must work together to bring stability at family level. It
will contribute into more harmonious societies.
Author :
Akanksha Sharma.
Date -30 July 2014
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date - 31 July- 2014
Self enquiry Questions
Dependency of Marriage on Species type:
When
Marriage is being referred as a Union , the
distinguishing factor has been provided as Love and mutual commitment. Rituals
of Marriage are also termed as Optional. So with the minimum requirement of
commitment are mutual commitment b/w two bodies with self less and expectation
less love.
Self
less and expectation less love can also happen between different species types,
In another optional point even mating is termed as optional.. so even if there
is no Mating, yet self less expectation less love between two species is
possible , will it be called marriage?
No we don't call it as a
marriage.
In a
cosmic blue print this also holds a meaning of binding between consciousness,
love binds consciousness. But it will not be a marriage. Would it be a
connection not the oneness?
Being a
connection is not possible , because we claim supreme consciousness is only
one, then it does not defined as connection, it only define oneness.
If love between different species also leads
us to oneness then what is difference between being a couple. Just like every
other species, every other individual human can be treated, if we get connected
out of love with them then we all lead
to oneness. then what is different in marriage?
For a Phenomenon of Marriage to
happen, there are few fundamental assumptions in the society
Fundamental body specific
criteria according to society.
·
Specie type should be same
·
Bodies of both of the partners should be mature
: a toddlers body can not be married to a young and grown adult
·
It have been based on Genders too, but now we
are also able to see same gender marriages in Human.
OK ..
Why do we have these type of body
requirements ---- 1.
We see
normally all species follows these body requirements for mating ------2.
Cross
Gender requirements ------ 3.
All three requirements points
towards giving birth to offspring and Children. Giving birth to children is the
fundamental reason of mating. Marriage is a fundamental institution of
Controlled Mating within Human.
Controlled Mating?
Controlled mating : where human
have restriction with whom relationship is to be established. A human can
voluntarily declare with whom s/he want to have mating relationship, or society
can make them relate to each other.
So: below
3 points are clear.
1.) Marriage
is an invention of human around mating. Natural activity is - Mating.
2.) Mating
can have a phenomenon of Spouse change, or Partner change.
3.)
Spouse change is allowed by the cosmos and It does not impact on cosmos at all.
Then what was the need of Controlled Mating?
Why it was introduced?
Phenomenon of Controlled Mating:
When wise man examined and
conducted social experiments, they found
controlled mating brought more peace and focus to individual's mind.
while the mating requirements are also fulfilled which are natural requirements
of man and woman, It also introduce peace , security , predictability and
stability to individual's mind.
Another reason of controlled
mating was requirement of togetherness
due the sophisticated behaviour of human
baby. Mating produced human baby , but safety of that baby is required. Human
baby takes more time to grow to become self capable, while mother too take more
time to recover. Protection of mother and the baby made it required for human
to figure out solution. Society became first solution. Controlled mating played
a second major role. When a man committed to a woman, she become assured. She
could become more creative and start managing family, wealth, raising children.
She left the insecurity and started creating an establishment of her own with
the man. growing wealth and assets.
This entire setup of a house,
became more useful when human grew old, they were neither desirous and nor
capable of mating. When they were desirous for support, love and togetherness
during last days of life. This advanced setup , single partner , children ,
home and family become very useful. This is again an arrangement , but Cosmos
had possibility of this arrangement too. The way Cosmos dont resist living
alone, same way cosmos doesn't resist living in arrangements too. While
households made their arrangements with kids, relatives friends, and families..
Saints made the arrangements in friends, Students, Ashrams and with various
other methods.
This was a major step towards
society and progress. It structured the society. With a more assured
environment around, men and women found themselves more secure, more happy,
expending in consciousness. Society become more stable. An assured environment around all, made
seekers to seek the phenomenon, Solution providers to provide solution for a
more stable and established society. It worked. and so it came in practise.
The controlled mating and
commitment was a phenomenon already existing in Cosmos. The moment commitment
was introduced, consciousness become more harmonious and society too. It was achievement of human that we explored
this phenomenon and utilised it.
So controlled mating played an in
important role in high consciousness, stability and harmony of individual and
society. Though Cosmos does not resist change of spouse, but cosmos provide
benefits for commitments too.
If
phenomenon of Controlled mating or Commitment is natural and already existing
in Cosmos, then it must also be followed by other species.
It is followed. Not necessary
that any specific specie type have to have follow it, any two consciousness in
body of any specie can also follow the phenomenon. I have myself witnessed a
couple of Dog following one partner law strictly. No body have ordered them to do it, but the
couple live this way.
One partner mating brings more
confidence in each other. partner become close to each other, share ups and
downs of life. when both of them are gentle and ready to accept each other,
they make a good couple and stable surroundings.
Controlled
Mating and Commitment provide Structured society , Harmony, Peace and
opportunity to become more creative. Yet the Change of Spouse is applicable in
case commitment , untimely death of one of the partner. It create incompletion
too , when most of the time step father or mother do not accept step children.
or in case one of the partner or couple are not able to give birth to the
children. or when they don't get along with each other. In examples like such examples a human must seek
for the change or partner.
Change of spouse is a phenomenon,
which is being practiced in societies. Controlled mating does not resist change
of spouse. It is flexible, yet the focus goes on Why this Change is required.
Context of action takes an importance here.
How ever it is not essential to
have a change of spouse too. like in case of step children, A parent can take a
decision of raising the children alone without looking for a change of spouse.
Where come that Type1 marriage here then Union and Love: Controlled Mating does not implies to
that.
Controlled mating does not imply
Type 1 Marriage : but in a type 1 marriage only controlled mating is being
followed. A couple voluntarily declares each other their only partners and live
together, without seeking change of partner in any condition. they decide not
to share their bodies for mating with others. and later gets a union in their
consciousness. Union
of consciousness is achieved by this method, but finding union of consciousness
is not the goal of such a commitment. Goal
of such an commitment is just to be with each other , Because this is what they
desire for. Being Concerned , Caring for each other's requirements, feelings
and ups and downs.. this is what they desire for. In process of being with each other, they gets united. This is Union . With other relations, friends or love for other
species body is not shared for various purposes. However the Marriage relation
takes unique position as couple shares each and every space of their being with
each other. They live comfortable in combined space.
If one of the partner keeps
hidden space, doubts or non transparency in their space, it is not the complete
sharing and oneness, or union. They have a black hole where there are chances
of incompletion. but when both of the
partners have complete space, there is a Union .
So Marriage which makes two
consciousness a complete Union is a relation
where both of the partners have complete space. It is achieved by Love,
Understanding, Compassion, Youthfulness, Transparency, Happiness and
Experiencing life together. Not only both of them follows AIRE, they also goes
beyond to live blissful and joyful.
In a Marriage when Volunteer
Commitment have already happened , Change of spouse is not defined.
Does
this NO Change of Spouse in such a volunteer commitments exist beyond life?
No Idea, But it existed in
relation ship of Lord Shiva and Devi Parvati. Its a mutual commitment to be
with one. It will survive, because Cosmos fulfils what we want. When we want it
to happen, it happens.
So What
is the Out Come:
Its God to have stable
relationship. Its easiest way to remain committed , love each other and
experience oneness in Cosmos. Like we say Goddess is lord of tantra, why not we
must say its an impactful technique to experience Love, Care and Bliss for man
and woman. Its receiving blessings , fortune , wealth and Dharma together. With
a combined consciousness, this is easiest way to make 1 and 1 : 11 instead of 2. :)
Stable marriage should be
promoted. Incompletion from marriage should be worked out. How ever Cosmos
provide us with both of the options, but with this one, we reap expansion in
combined consciousness instantly. It is a choice of individual, to make a
commitment up to this level or not, yet if made, society would also have good
harmony and waves.
As an individual its beyond
capacity of words to express : what it mean to have a loving and caring partner
and a mutually committed marriage relationship. Its something like cosmic
energies have taken shape to pamper us individually. and we are blessed with our personnel
consciousness to love and care for.
Means Being
in love with each other and forgetting rest ?
No, being in love with each other
and feeling responsible for others. This is what is Lela all God and Goddess
Idols are shown doing. Being in love with each other and being responsible for
entire society. Incorporating AIRE, with love compassion and bliss in all of
our life and in life of children, is the outcome of Love and Union
within the marriage.
My Outcome is. :
Stability, Loving and caring behaviour should be promoted in Marriage
Relationship.
Jokes on marriage relation should Not be cracked, it may introduce incompletion.
Jokes on marriage relation should Not be cracked, it may introduce incompletion.
Its a requirement of time that we must stop mocking marriage
relationship and calling spouse as : Ghar Ki Daal, Ghaar Ka Chawal,.. or
addressing by such type of words. We must promote and recreate true joy of
being into a relationship with each other instead of communicating its boring
or tasteless . If this would have been tasteless or boring : It could not have
survived on earth for so long.
